An Open Letter to President Obama Requesting $10,000 For Promoting Social Unity.
Your solution to the issue involving Officer Crowley and Professor Gates, which is to sit together and have a beer, is simple, yet perfect.
(1888PressRelease) July 30, 2009 - Dear President Obama,
I am delighted to see that you are doing a great job thus far into your presidency. I'm glad that you are pursuing what you promised in your campaigns and look forward to seeing more good work from you.
I am also pleased that you aren't perfect and are subject to mistakes, but do your best to try and correct them once you have realized your mistake. Your solution to the issue involving Officer Crowley and Professor Gates, which is to sit together and have a beer, is simple, yet perfect.
We all know the benefits of social consumption of beer, yet we believe the American people have been raised to believe that it is wrong to do. We on the other hand think that, if drunken properly and responsibly, social consumption of beer can have many advantages, such as fond memories.
That is why we want to start a campaign to promote the awareness of drinking beer. However, we are missing a vital component to my campaign, that is beer. See, we don't make much money, and so purchasing the amount of beer to start my campaign is difficult. That is why we am asking for your help.
Consider this a spending bill. We are respectfully requesting Ten Thousand Dollars ($10,000) for beer money. This money will be used for the purchase of a large quantity of various alcoholic beverages that will be consumed by us and beer supporters of our choosing (you are invited to join us), in support of social unity.
The benefits to accepting this proposal are numerous. First of all, peace and social unity will be promoted and supported. Second, our purchases will help boost the economy and possibly save the jobs of many liquor store owners. Third, the money requested is cost effective, and so petite I doubt the republicans will spend $100,000 in campaign ads, attacking you for the "wasteful spending" of a mere $10,000.
Many people support this campaign, including actor Micheal Papajohn, who kindly gave us $40 for last weekend.
Thank you for reading, and I hope to hear from you soon.